Power of Lard EP


 
 

  Alain Jourgensen- Guitars

  Paul Barker- Bass

  Jeff Ward- Drums, Vocals

  Jello Biafra- Vocals
 
 

  Virus 72 Alternative Tentacles

  1989
 


The Power of Lard
 
 

Lard

You can see it

In the clouds up in the sky
 
 

Lard

Floats by and clusters

in our water supply
 
 

Lard

It's all of us, man

In our pores and in our hair
 
 

Lard

What we conceal

In those corny clothes we wear
 
 

Lard is all

Lard is divine

Lard is in control

Lard whips and chains our soul

(Lard) We carry credit cards

(Lard) we live in fear of art

Lard is the AUM

Lard is revolution

Lard is the tapeworm

In the bottle of cheap tequila

That comes alive at night

And sneaks up and

Bites you nipple

Lard

Lard
 
 

Nowadays, most of us need someone

To run our personal life

Someone to see that the plants are watered

Someone to make sure the place is clean

Someone to make sure dinner is waiting

Someone to call for theater tickets

Someone to make up those cheap excuses
 
 

What we need is...

Lard

Lard
 
 

The answer

The dancer

The ointment

The dream

Absorb it

Inflame it

Respect it

Molest it
 
 

The country right now just wants to be soothed

And told it doesn't have to pay

Or sacrifice

Or learn

No one is over the hill

When the mountain comes to Mohammed
 
 

Lard

Lard

Lard
 
 

We love to eat

We love to pray

Mold over mind

Hooray!
 
 

Every time I take a crap

It's a cosmic experience

Religion and chemicals

Are the key to the future

Next time we have sex

Just pretend that I'm Ed Meese

The weasels have it down, man

It's a whole new age
 
 

Lard
 
 

Which would you prefer -

A computer or a gun?

The sharks outlived the dinosaurs, you know
 
 

Pity the poor trainer

In the stable when the racehorse farts

Poison oak really is

The aphrodisiac of the gods

When people are asleep

We must all become alarm clocks

Hey man, Life is my college
 
 

It's dental floss of the mind

Who will babysit the babysitters?
 
 

Ever hear about the guy in New York

Whose dick fell off in the bath

After he shot it full of coke?

It's OK to run out of butter in Zambia

Just smear squashed caterpillars on your toast

Waiter, there's a terrorist in my soup

Which came first - Max Headroom or Gerald Ford?

Are you a man or are you a mouse?

If you love your fun, die for it!
 
 

Die for it!
 
 

And feel

The power of Lard

The power of Lard

The power of Lard

The power of Lard
 
 

Avoid everything, etc...
 
 
 
 
 


Hellfudge
 
 

You never know

When it says you gotta go
 
 

Hellfudge
 
 

To them cheap motels down in Baton Rouge
 
 

Hellfudge
 
 

Roll down the window of the limousine
 
 

Hellfudge
 
 

I'll pay you 15 bucks if you perform for me

(No more)
 
 

Hellfudge
 
 

I ain't givin' you one penny more

Gotta buy another TV station for the Lord
 
 

Hellfudge
 
 

Can you imagine what it's like

To have to flash and pose
 
 

Hellfudge
 
 

While a fat TV preacher

Sits and beats off in front of you...
 
 

Hellfudge
 
 

Same one who's so upset

With anti-smut crusades (fancy that)
 
 

Hellfudge
 
 

Oh, Lord,

Someone let the air out of my tires
 
 

Hellfudge
 
 

I'm stuck - with my pants down

Red-handed in sin

But with money like mine

The Lord always forgives - me
 
 

When I'm dictator

You will ALL

Be under the thumb of Jeezus

The law of the Bible

Is the law of the land

Executions for witchcraft

Televised live at five
 
 

All rocn and roll is pornography

And that mixed coed swimming - PHOOEY!

I tell ya

It promotes problems of the flesh

Problems of the flesh

The flesh

The flesh

The flesh

I can't stand it anymore
 
 

My fundamentalist army's

Crackin' down full swirl
 
 

Hellfudge
 
 

Polyester suit nazis

Will control the world
 
 

Hellfudge
 
 

If you think Khomeni

Is a step back in time
 
 

Hellfudge
 
 

Just wait til I decide

What you read and who dies
 
 

Hellfudge
 
 

You think we're finished

Boy, you must be queer

We get a little stronger

Every year

When I bilk your money

I'm moral, man

But I got a little problem

I just can't say no

To that Hellfudge
 
 

So take off them clothes

Slowly, now, slowly

And twitch your little flounder just like that

Yeahhh... Just like they do

In all the smut rags I pretend to hate so much

Bite down real hard

Smile...SLUT!

I own you...Look humiliated, try to cry

I despise you so much I hate myself

Mmmmmmmmmm

Tastes almost as good

As one of them green bubble gum cigars

Yeah! Hellfudge

There's a whole lotta shakin' goin' on in here

But don't tell my cousin, OK?

Yeahhhh!

Great Balls o' Fire!

Hellfudge!
 
 
 
 
 


Time to Melt
 
 

Lay me down on a griddle of sweat

Lay me down, it's been a long day

Time to unwind, time to relax

Let the tension flow away
 
 

My body's weary and full of holes

Hollow jets in my fingers and toes

Too tired to masturbate

No sound in the dark as I float in outer space
 
 

Touch down on an astroturf plain

Peewee golf balls roll by my face

Golf tees hammered through my feet and my hands

Nailed as an example again
 
 

Tied down with fishing line

Liliputian sacrifice

Fireworks go off, I hear the cheers

Smell the hot dogs

Smell the mustard and beer
 
 

Sharp needles pierce my flesh

Hypodermics press down and inject

20 gallons of Canfield's diet fudge soda

Effervescent bubbling chocolate blood
 
 

Micron by micron my flesh starts to melt

All that's left is brain and bones

Hot beams on the cool wet sand

Bury me - with the help of the wind and the waves
 
 

Submerged in the cool soil

Earthworms crawl in and crawl out

Further down is the underground aquifer cave

The bats and blindfish

Are all my friends
 
 

Soil hardens and it starts to crack

The lake is dry as the desert air

Sidewinders crawl through my eye sockets

Their soft white underbelly feels like love
 
 

Blowing tumbleweeds stick to my ribs

Night falls, the sky is red

Captain Beefheart flies up on gargoyle wings

Talons reach down and take me back again
 
 

Reborn on a bed of white

Incubator filters out the light

A thousand breasts massage my face

But Life is calling to take me away

("Open up! We have a warrant!")

Learn to walk another day

Learn to walk another day

Ohm, ohm, ohm, ohm, etc...









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